Wednesday, September 06, 2006

Don't Make Me Say It!

For a quick lunch today, #1 and I went to KFC, the drive thru. Yes, I know the stuff is bad for us, and I always feel icky after visiting, but sometimes you just need a little crunchy grease. Anyway, at the speaker, I ordered a side of corn for #1, and the girl on the other end said, "do you want corn on the cob or loose corn?" What? Loose corn? Who says "loose corn?" This happened a couple of weeks ago as well,--we sat in our car and laughed, and I replied back into the speaker that I wanted "corn not on the cob." I just couldn't bring myself to say "loose corn" because it's not a real thing. But today I felt forced to give in to KFC language.

I have the same reaction at Starbucks, who has chosen to rename our standard size terms. Am I alone in recognizing that there is no such thing as a venti coffee? I consistently refuse to order coffee in those terms, and the snit on the other side of the counter consistently corrects me. "OK, that's a GRANDE latte," they say with snotty Starbucks attitude.

As a former English major, I recognize the importance of flexibility in language, that a language needs to evolve in order to remain relevant, but I resist the notion that fast food be the source of the evolution. I want a medium French Roast, and I want whole kernel corn in my bowl!

Hmmm, as I read through this before hitting the publish button, I'm the one who sounds like a snit, but I hold to my point.

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