So, I have this sinus thing going on, or something. It's not quite a sinus infection, and it's not the flu, so maybe it's just a cold. I don't know, but I resorted to taking an over-the-counter pill for it. I never take medicine—hardly ever get a headache, never go to the doctor, don't take useless things for a cold. But this sinus thing seemed like it needed a pill. So, I bought a box of Sinutab, half day-time and half night-time, and I took a night-time pill a couple of days ago right before my weary head hit the pillow.
I slept all night long without interruption, which is rare, and when I woke up yesterday morning, I thought that was a good sign. I thought that until I got past the quietness of morning and tried to communicate, and I discovered I was unable to string two words together or even think of single words. I was fumbling through my blog post and would get stuck on the simplest word. I would snap my fingers and say, "What's that word...what's that...what's the..." until finally the word would come to me.
It was such an odd feeling, and after a few hours I thought I was getting over it, but then for some stupid reason I thought I should take a day-time Sinutab just to help nip the sinus thing once and for all. Turns out I should have just let my immune system do its job.
I make an effort to present myself reasonably well when I interview people for a newspaper story. If I am not poised and polished, I am at least coherent and prepared. But after that second dose, my brain turned to turnip mush and then completely drained of any thought process whatsoever. It was in that state that I tried to talk to a PR representative from a hospital about a new website that compares all the hospitals in Ohio. I had two simple questions for the woman, a woman who was not forthcoming with her answers, which seemed odd given it's her job to talk to the press. I got the first question out with some fumbling, and she would only repeat my question without answering it. That threw me off, and suddenly, I couldn't think of a single thing to say to the woman. Not a clearer way of asking the first question, not the basis of the second question. Nothing. I found myself sitting in my office chair with my pencil in hand and staring blankly at the wall. So, I finally did the only thing I could think of. I said to the woman, "I'm sorry, I have to hang up now," and I hung up on her. And that was that.
Fortunately, my editor thought it was sort of funny and has given me a couple of days grace before I have to finish this website story, so I haven't really fumbled too badly. I've just learned that medicine head, which is what my nurse friend says I have, is no fun. And it's no way to spend the day. It's certainly no way to spend New Year's Eve, so I purposely didn't dose up last night even though I could have used some help sleeping. And I won't take a stupid pill today (or should I say "Stupid Pill") because now I have to make butternut squash ravioli from scratch, and if I were on drugs, I'm afraid I might stuff the things with baked beans or something.
Happy New Year to everyone.